wow Cam Newton is a total babe this whole peer pressure to care about football might not be so bad after all
It’s a Thursday night before finals week in the Bistro. One man stands out. He’s playing chess against himself. His name is Zach Comfort and most people must strain their neck to make conversation with him. He spots you across the room, asks for a cigarette. You go outside as a means of procrastination. “Do you guys want to engage in some symbolism with me?” You say yes. He pulls out the plastic used for linking beers together in a six-pack and asks you to pull on one end. He pulls on the other end. When it breaks, he smiles and says, “We’re saving the fishies.” He asks you what you want to talk about. You’re stressed out. Philosophy majors are never stressed out. You politely excuse yourself to work toward what you think will brighten your future. But you are on edge, and the philosophy major is happy to pull apart recyclable goods. He is happy and you are unhappy. He doesn’t care about footnotes. He cares about the well-being of sea creatures. He will always care about the fishies; you will one day cease to care about footnotes.